The sun had risen on day 2. Glimmering off the morning dew of the grass outside. It was a glimmer of hope. Little did we know hard times were ahead. We should have known to expect the worst when only a tropical Muggle cat was present. But he had high and flattering expectations on how much the finished product of the Office Task would be worth. So we proceeded with caution. Read on for the most shocking scoop of your life.
The first order of the day was to inspect the result of Day 1's labour. Hopefully it would be fruit.
First to test the firmness of the mixture.
Firm as a nut!
Now it was time to remove the Darlick from his plastic encasing. If it was too realistic it would kill us all ahahahhhhh!
Where's the bloody instructions?
Oh I seeee.
There was brief concern when the Darlick appeared to have leaked and created a large "plaster flat". This proved to be organic and harmless.
It was as smooth as a plaster baby!!!
WE'D DONE IT!!
The plaster Darlick was PERFECT!!!!
It attempted to vapourise the room. But it did not.
The remaining "titanium alloy"!!! ahahahaa was placed in the mixing tub which was no longer needed. This was thrown in the bin in one attempt.
The Darlick mould was no longer needed also. If it was used to make more Darlicks we'd have a terrifying army of Darlicks that would cancel the Office Task aaargh oh no put it in the bin!
Oh dear wait the mixing tub was a necessary component!!
It was time to consider our next plan of attack. A Darlick is nothing without a Tardis brand telephone box to battle it with its mounted machine guns!! LET'S make one!!! >.<
The two tardiss mould halves fitted together like the darlick mould halves did. Making the Darlick was so easy we didn't have to try very hard. Nothing was going to go wrong.
There was only one bag of French plaster of the total two remaining. It was time to perform another shaking motion.
We had learnt many lessons. Following the scissor disaster of Day 1 that ruined one of the videos, I used a unique knife and fork method instead.
SUCCESS! HIGH FIVE, MICHAEL JORDAN!!
It was time to carefully measure the required fresh liquid water. We had to be very careful, if Carex got into the system the task would be a bubbling failiure!!!!!!!!!!!
It was too much. Too too much.
Careful James!!
Good enough.
I sat back in my seat to do the next bit of the Office Task 2009 Mission Doctor Who
Lets put poweder to water, baby!
As we were taught in Office school, a tight seal had to be formed between the tarddis mould and the target container.
ARGH NO!! CANCELLED.
Never mind.
The tardistub combo had to be freshly attached to the lid of powder and water again like last time. I have inherited from my father a very smooth method of performing this particular task.
A tight squeeze will prevent the leaking which was experienced on Day 1 but never mentioned for the integrity of the Office Task.
It was time. You remember the rules. 15 seconds of swirling motion. One minute of waiting IN SILENCE. aND THEN 52 SHAKES.
DISASTER. I was thinking of our rivals the Bereau Energy and their pathetic project the Bereau Chore! Their task is so funny it made me laugh!
No matter. We will begin the process again.
Something was wrong. DEADLY WRONG.
Go back to Day 1. You will see during the 52 shakes there was a powerful "sloshing" sound. This time, on Day 2, the second day of Office Task, there was no "sloshing" sound. It was our darkest hour and we needed to investigate.
I delved my finger into the French plaster. What was once liquid had become a semi-bulky paste. It wouldn't slosh for all the tea in china!
We had to work fast. Additional water was brought to the mixture. Though it was so urgent we could not take pictures.
Luckily we had forks from our sausage and chips and pie and chips respectively. The fork was used to agitate the mixture to prvent it from thickening twice!!
At this critical moment Matthew decided to fuck about with Gypsy cat on the stairs. The mixture was thickening! I could only stir for so long!!!
Finally he returned with my camera to record the unorthodox pouring method we had to invoke.
This gentle fork-patting continued for some time until we had what seemed like a satisfactory surface. Truth be told, only time would tell. I was terrified. Gypsy cat was terrified. Muggle cat was laughing at our failiure. He has been brainwashed by the Bureau Energy.
Carefully, I placed our pride and joy on the shelf of truth, where it would remain safe for 90 minutes.
90 minutes to us meant tomorrow!!!
We had learnt many lessons today. Most of all, do not be fooled by the soothing rays of Muggle cat's presence. He is a beast of bad will. A monster of misfortune. A cat of crap. He was punished for his misdeeds.